September 2010 by Solomon II 3 Comments
I write quite a bit about sluts because I have a love/hate relationship with them. I love them when they’re young and embrace their nature without apology, but I loathe them when their clocks start ticking and they think they can lie their way into a marriage contract by swearing they are nothing less than sweet little near-virgin angels. It insults my intelligence, and I respond with all the fury of hell.
The sluttiness of her past bothers me much less than her deceitfulness in the present.
By the way girls, tell whatever good girl stories you’d like. Your Facebook, MySpace, Flickr, Photobucket, and those old blogs you forgot about tell on you. Sure, you may be smart enough to clean them up a bit, but your friends still have you tagged in that wet t-shirt contest in Cancun with great comments like “I can’t believe you hooked up with those two guys lol =)” Plus, google cache is not your friend.
But I digress. Let’s have a little fun, shall we?
To determine a woman’s slut factor, use this formula:
First, find out her Good Girl Number (GGN) by computing (0.5 * Age) + (-7). The GGN is the amount of sexual partners I’m guessing most men would deem more or less appropriate for her age.
Now that you have her GGN, you can determine her slut factor (SF). Her slut factor is the amount of partners over and above her good girl number, or (GGN-Actual Number of Partners) = SF.
Example: Jessica is 24 years old and has slept with 26 men. Her GGN is 5, because half her age minus 7 equals 5. But she has fucked 26 men, so her slut factor is 21 because the actual number of men she’s banged minus her GGN equals 21.
Here’s a few thoughts:
1. This entire post is stupid, and was written with a smirk. You’ll never know her real number so you should stop reading this and go get laid.
2. Outside of a farm in Iowa or a religious cult in Texas, there’s probably not a woman on the planet who could live up to her GGN, so again, reading this post is a waste of time. Every man’s snowflake is another man’s whore. Get over it. Go find some chick and giver her something else to lie about.
3. So if this post is half retarded, why am I writing it? Because this algorithm could actually wake you the hell up if you’re considering marriage – an equally retarded move.
Here’s how I view the sexual market value of different women according to their Slut Factor. Again, this is the number of men she’s slept with over and above her GGN. Click on the image to enlarge if you need to.
What’s your current girl’s Slut Factor? I’m guessing the one I’ve been seeing for the past two weeks probably weighs in between 9 and 12. Just a guess though. Too early to tell. It’s ok though because due to a need to confess or the urge to brag, she’ll tell on herself. They always do.
Filed under Proverbs Tagged with dating advice, feminism, relationships, sexual past, sluts
As iron sharpeneth iron, so one man sharpeneth another. Proverbs 27:17
Whoa whoa whoa.
Look at it this way: the higher our ‘slut factor’, the more inclined we are to blow your effin mind in the sack.
Besides, just because a gal likes her sex does not mean she doesn’t have a well-rounded intellectual side as well.
By well rounded, you mean well thought out rationalizations for being a slut.
Who says Americans can’t learn other languages? I just translated whoreanese!
No ck, not really. The ex-slut marries a beta, whom she thinks she’s too good for, after all her husband isn’t as cute or fun as the drummer who used to bang her. Thus, the beta should just be grateful that she’s a REAL WOMAN and he’s not jerking off in the bathroom instead. They won’t go to the trouble to please their husbands like they did previous boyfriends. “Well I married him didn’t I?”. The husband just pays an inflated price for mediocre sex, since she is now a good girl and oral is “degrading to women” or whatever.
MyNameIsJim
Try oral is “degrading to this woman” not oral is “degrading to women”.
Each gender should stop deciding what all of their own gender thinks.
I find it funny though how even being 1 point over the GGN = not marriage material but just possible marriage material though my girls get b*tched if they consider a guy lower than a salary just a possible long term material.
I thought guys would know men & women desire different things. Guys/girls aren’t hypocrites if they desire something they don’t have just if they view the don’t haves as lesser without viewing themselves as such (whatever happened to indifference).
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