November 11, 2010 by Solomon II 25 Comments
In my professional world, we often help clients by designing interactive programs which seamlessly integrate with their overall corporate messaging. Taking a “one voice” approach to all their marketing efforts takes time and money, but in the end, the cohesiveness of their external communication builds familiarity and brand awareness among the target clientele.
Often the most difficult part of this process is coming up with what we call an “elevator speech”. The theory here is to come up with a terse yet educational response to a potential client when he asks “So, what do you do?” and you only have 90 seconds between a few floors to make your pitch. Conveying the scope and purpose of a company including end user benefits in a memorable way in less than 90 seconds can be a daunting task.
The situation is similar in the Manosphere. All too often I find myself talking with a friend or coworker out on a show site somewhere about their interaction with women, and it’s hard to give them advice or convey the lessons I’ve learned without needing a formal hour long presentation. How do you explain female hypergamy, the rationalization hamster, and a host of other concepts during casual conversation with some guy who just wants to lament about his wife or girlfriend?
Those of us who write and read these blogs are no smarter than the average man. The only thing that gives us a leg up in the dating and marriage arena is the fact that we take what most men intrinsically know and give it proper terminology. We then use that terminology to define a situation and react accordingly using proven strategies. I guess what I’m getting at is that while most men are busy ranting A, B, C, D, E, F, G… we quickly assess the situation, call it the alphabet, and keep on moving.
It pains me to sit and listen to an otherwise educated a man say “It’s like, I don’t know, man. I mean, sometimes I just think that… well, I want to say something, but I’m not sure what she’s thinking, so… I… I don’t know, man. I can’t figure her out.” I do my best to help by listening and giving targeted advice, but often I simply don’t have the time to help a man understand and accept what he already knows. I can’t simply look at a friend or coworker and say “Her clock is ticking and you’re a willing Beta, but her hypergamous nature is causing her to struggle between settling for you and taking one last ride on the Alpha cock carousel. Her rationalization hamster will allow her to do both without guilt, and when she’s done she’ll undoubtedly blame you for putting her in a position to have to choose in the first place. In the end, you’ll be showered with shaming language if you refuse to accept responsibility for her actions.”
We need an elevator speech. A quick summation of basic points to get these guys started down the road to enlightenment. Something to pique their interest and get them interested in researching ways to improve their married or dating lives.
Although it would be impossible to condense everything a man needs to know in to one 90 second sound bite, we need to start somewhere. I’ve been wondering what I would say to an 18 year old Solomon II if I had the chance to go back in time and speak with him for only 90 seconds. Of course, I’m sure 18 year old S2 would tell me to go fuck myself, but for the purpose of illustration, let’s assume the little asshole would listen. I think the one 90 second elevator speech that would have helped me the most is:
“There are no good women, and there are no bad women. There are just women. Women do what they want when they want and justify their actions later. That’s why it’s important to find a woman of character who is naturally inclined to do the things which are wholesome, respectful, productive, and conducive to rearing the offspring produced by your potential union.
A woman’s character is of utmost importance. A woman’s past actions matter. In fact, her past matters more than anything else because it reveals the character she developed during her impressionable years. A woman may change what she does, but she can’t change who she is or repair her reputation. Like hot or cold water eventually comes back to room temperature when no external forces are present, so a woman returns to her base character level when no external forces are present. If you choose to be a woman’s external force in order to exact a temperature change within her, don’t be surprised when she reverts to her room temperature character the moment you’re not around.
What defines a woman of good character varies from man to man. Know which character traits are important to you. Study to learn the signs of these traits, and study harder to learn how manipulative women mimic these traits when they are not in possession of them. Judge harshly and without apology. Recognize flaws within yourself and actively work to right them, but never let a woman convince you to consider your own personal flaws as a valid reason to overlook hers.
Recognize, protect, and celebrate a woman of good character, for she is exceedingly rare. Recognize, expose, and shame a woman of low character for she is a parasite driven by consumption and will kill her host. Above all, know that a woman of character and a woman of risible morals are often indistinguishable at first glance. Only the erudite man committed to attaining the knowledge and skills to determine one from the other stands a chance of reaching his full potential.”
At least a few of the major topics are covered: Virgin/Whore Syndrome and the Rationalization Hamster in paragraph 1, Double Standards and White Knighting in paragraph 2, Shaming Language in paragraph 3, and Snowflaking in paragraph 4.
Whether or not this is an acceptable elevator speech is debatable, but at least it’s a start. It’s not too offensive, and outside of the workplace, it shouldn’t set off too many alarms with the PC police. You can even express this viewpoint around women since the majority of them would undoubtedly agree – what with each and every single one of them being perfect and blameless women of impeccable character.
Simple bitches.
Filed under Random Brain Thinkin’ Tagged with dating advice, PUA, relationships
As iron sharpeneth iron, so one man sharpeneth another. Proverbs 27:17
25 Responses to The Elevator Speech
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jj says:
I’m really liking your blog, everything you say about is true because I’ve been through it, so its the truth.
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dalrock says:
You should contact Welmer and ask if he will post this as a guest piece on The Spearhead.
[Thanks. Maybe I will. BTW, I have no idea why your comments keep getting hung up in moderation.]
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Bob says:
This elevator-speech conept has some serious potential. Could be just the thing the Manosphere needs to get out of the blogs. I’ll be interested to see where this goes.
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Solomon II says:
@Bob: Thanks. And you’re right. We do need to find a way to get out of the blogs and in to the mainstream. All we need is a bit of national exposure to start getting our message out. The problem is that the entire female population would condemn our message along with the 80% of men who are pussy whipped betas. The 20% of men left who are greater Betas or Alphas wouldn’t be too eager to publicly sign on either for fear of retribution from the rest of the population.
Alpha males have to hold a job too. There’s a reason most of us don’t post under our real names or even disclose our location. We know the man who would be the Manosphere’s Savior would undoubtedly get nailed to a cross, so instead, we opt to become anonymous disciples of the man we’d like to be.
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Lisa says:
I’m a female reader and I believe you have made a lot of valid points. I just disagree with you that the majority of women are this way. Most of my friends were married by age 25. I do know some women who slutted around, but I still believe that’s the exception. But who knows, I’m 39, so maybe things really have changed that drastically since my 20′s.
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@Lisa: I work in marketing, advertising and PR in a major city, so my world is slut central. I hear it’s the same in the medical and legal fields too around here. I understand we’ve had different experiences, but I think you may be bang on about things having changed drastically in the past 9 to 19 years.
Thanks for the comment.
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Gunslingergregi says:
Naaa nothing has changed it is the same.
What has changed is the knowledge of men about how they are being fucked.
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Do you ever feel as though, in a small way, you are perpetuating the problem? Sort of like “if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem?” Maybe if men would turn their back on these women, the women would be forced to act classier.
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@Gunslingergregi: You’re probably right. Men are now acknowledging women for who they are. They are seeing them as they are and not as they see themselves.
@Lisa: My entire goal in life is to be a part of the problem. It’s not my job to force social change. Somebody is going to bang these girls, so it might as well be me. Even the “good girls” are susceptible to their own nature, so knowing how to engage that nature is of great importance to me. Read my post “Special Needs Girls” to see what I’m talking about.
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I read that post, and it was hilarious. But the term “boyfriend” is used so casually these days, that for all you know she’d only had maybe one or two dates with him. Or maybe she was getting ready to dump him anyway.
Regardless, I am still not convinced of the fact that every woman in your world class, cosmopolitan city is a slut. I don’t know what you look like, but if women fall into bed with you with seemingly no effort, you’re probably quite stunning. Which means you have options.
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novaseeker says:
Lisa –
It has changed quite a bit since then. I’m 43, so around your age range. When I was in my 20s the number of promiscuous women in that age range was smaller than it is now. Not “objectively small” where I was living at the time (Manhattan), mind you, but still smaller than it is now. There was another generational shift (it’s almost a generation between the 40ish age range and the folks in their early 20s now).
Also, location matters. Even today. The major league big blue coastal cities are *very* promiscuous in that age range today. NY, DC, SF, LA, Miami, etc. When you get to places in the middle of the country, the promiscuity culture is still there, of course, but much less prominent than in the big blue coastals. The reason is that the women who are interested in riding the alpha carousel want to go bright lights big city so that they can do the SATC imitation and so on. You do that in Manhattan or LA, not in Omaha.
As for the “being a part of the problem” — it doesn’t really work that way, and it never has. The reason why is that there are *always* men who will line up for sex, if it is on offer. Men are inherently less discriminatory when it comes to sexual partners, and numerous studies back this up. So, if a woman is providing access to sex and is reasonably attractive, most men will grab it — and that’s known by men and women alike. In the current arena, that means that the alpha males get most of the sex, because in the locales mentioned above, the women are deploying sex in order to access “Mr. Big” –> and Mr. Big will screw all the way down to 5s-6s if they are on offer, sexually, meaning that the guys who are sexually attractive can, and do, monopolize the sex market for ~40-50% of the women in these places (at least the ones who are in the sex market to begin with).
Seen in this context, Game is simply a way for the rest of the men to “crash the party”, in terms of making themselves more sexually attractive to the women, and thereby grab access to some of this sex that is being more easily doled out by more women than at any time since our species was swinging from the trees. It was an adaptation that was virtually inevitable, given (1) how easily so many women were doling out sexual access yet (2) how constrained the percentage of men was to whom this liberal access was being given. It was to be expected that some of the rest of the men would find a way to squeeze themselves into that scenario, because otherwise it can very much be a feast-or-famine scenario, and you don’t want to be among the starving.
Nothing about this will change until women themselves begin to police each other again, as they did in the past, because they saw this as being in their collective self-interest (if too many women are giving away the milk for free, it screws the women who want to make men commit to get the milk). Unfortunately, women as a class are totally not there, and instead are over on the other side of that argument, viewing this behavior as liberating and empowering. And to some extent, on a very visceral level it is so — because it gives women sexual access to alphas on a liberal basis, which is existentially a big win for women, really. The trouble is that it makes commitment more elusive, and also alienates a lot of men who are stuck on the sidelines while the great orgy is taking place with ~20% of the men.
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@Lisa: I’m not stunning. In fact, I’d be completely average if I didn’t have a few inches in height on most other men. I think it’s the fact that I make good money and have a “don’t give me shit or I just might kill you” attitude that seems to attract a decent amount of pretty damn good looking women.
Keep in mind that a woman being “slutty” is not what this blog is about. It’s about them being liars and manipulators – it just so happens that they lie a lot about being ridden by every swinging dick in the city and manipulate men into thinking they’re marrying a lady when they’re really marrying a bunch of other dude’s leftovers.
I have a post already written on this matter. It’s in cue with a few more. It’ll be out within the month. It’s called “Truth In Advertising”.
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COMMENT MODERATION: I’m trying to find out why so many comments get hung up in moderation. My moderation settings are wide open. My apologies to all who do not see their comments immediately. Not censoring here. I’ll try to figure it out tonight.
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MNL says:
There’s another important use for that “elevator speech”. It’s useful for an audience that’s the least patient to hear it–especially from you, the presenter–but one that needs it the most. I’m talking about the audience of one’s own teenage son.
…Though like most of the fatherly advice one gives, it goes in/out the ears now when the audience is age 17-18. It won’t make sense until age 22+.
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@MNL
There’s another important use for that “elevator speech”. It’s useful for an audience that’s the least patient to hear it–especially from you, the presenter–but one that needs it the most. I’m talking about the audience of one’s own teenage son.You have to start younger than that. Our son is only 5 months old and his mother already gives him the “bitches is crazy” speech.
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Tarl says:
Do you ever feel as though, in a small way, you are perpetuating the problem? Sort of like “if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem?” Maybe if men would turn their back on these women, the women would be forced to act classier.
Oy vey. For every man who turns his back on a slut, there are ten alphas willing to bang her and a hundred betas willing to cater to her whims in the desperate and forlorn hope that they’ll get some. Enough men have a use for an easy lay that no slut will ever be “forced to act classier”.
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Esau says:
Thinking back to when I was 18 or 20, this speech would have been completely wasted on me, and I would have just found it annoying, or worse. So on behalf of my 18-20 y0 counterpart today, here is my reply:
“What you say may be true, but it’s completely irrelevant: before I can _exercise_ choice I have to first _have_ some choice. It’s like you’re giving a lecture on distinguishing vintages of wine to a dirt-poor peasant. Before going into the fine points of whom to appreciate and whom to avoid, you need to tell me how to f*cking get laid in the first place. Really, first things first.
Even once that’s taken care of, your view seems to rule out all but the slimmest possibility of a good life. If women of character really are exceedingly rare, then what are my chances of actually getting with one of them? If I’m not in the top 2% or 5% of men by any measure, then why shouldn’t I just kill myself now and get it over with? rather than be condemned to a life of manipulative, soulless harpies and golddiggers? Even if true, advice that cannot point the way to a good outcome is by definition useless, and is unlikely to be taken by anyone.”
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@Esau:
“…your view seems to rule out all but the slimmest possibility of a good life.”
Are you suggesting that a man can’t have a good life without a woman? If so, I disagree. It’s all about using the right tool for the job. Men need sex, money, food, and shelter. Money, food and shelter can be had without a woman, and the sex part, well, you can get that just about anywhere these days.
The problem arises when we think that the company of a woman will enhance the enjoyment of these things, and fail to make sure she’s a good woman.
Would this advice be ignored by most 18 year olds? Of course. I even wrote about it in the article. But give that speech to a man at the end of his rope (again) with yet another manipulating bitch on his hands, and you’ll see the light bulbs come on.
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Solomon — I appreciate your reply, but sense that we are operating on different planes. Specifically I have no idea in what world this
” and the sex part, well, you can get that just about anywhere these days”
is true for the main run of young men — assuming you’re not talking about using prostitutes or needing to learn complicated, unnatural Game MO’s. To me, your vision is a complete fantasy, where men have relations with a constant stream of women and are able to examine them judiciously and so pick and choose among them. When I was a young man, the lower 60-70% of my peers couldn’t get a decent girl (= someone actually sexually attractive, say from the upper 2/3 of women) into bed if their lives depended on it, and I don’t have any reason to think things are different for most young men today. Telling a young man in that position to be even more choosy is just meaningless. So, no, it’s that the typical 18 yo male will ignore this advice, it’s that I think this advice is simply irrelevant until the basic problem of getting regular, decent sex is solved.
In the longer term, yes, it is my personal view that settling down with one woman is necessary for a good life. I’m a natural monogamist who wants to raise a stable family within a life-long marriage. I don’t know how many of me there are in the world, maybe fewer than there used to be. You might say that I need to be even more choosy and judicious even than most men! to achieve this goal and avoid disaster, which is fine; but if you tell me that it’s flat-out impossible then I really have nothing to learn from you, you see?
Anyway, there may be some middle layer of men with choice to whom the elevator speech would in fact be useful, but I don’t think it’s really the touchstone that you hold it to be.
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Squared says:
The advice in this post is obviously sound and the elevator speech format is perfect for someone who hasn’t been introduced & enlightened to the darker side of female nature, but I agree with Esau that it’s of questionable practical relevance to a large contingent (a majority perhaps?) of men that age (and I’d even venture to say that this also applies to guys close to a decade older than that). Beggars can’t be choosers afterall. I think your summary with a few adjustments might be more suitable to a man in his late 20s/early 30s.
On a related note, my girlfriend told me an interesting anecdote this weekend. One of her friends (I give her a 6.5, but she’s a real sweetheart) has been dating a guy since the summer. I’ve met this guy on a couple of occasions now – 21 or 22 years old, certainly over 6’0″, quite good looking, a firefighter for close to a year now, and a genuine nice guy all around (and I don’t mean the indoctrinated, pussyfied beta variety, but rather a big joker who regularly negs girls and always blurts out whatever crosses his mind, without being an overbearing alpha badboy about it). My most educated guess would have been that he had probably done quite well with the ladies. The kicker? You guessed it. Much to my surprise, prior to meeting my girlfriend’s friend, he was a complete virgin. And I can assure you that it had nothing to do with religious conviction or other such ulterior motives either.
This isn’t the first time I hear such a story. Guys like this aren’t as rare as we might think they are.
Really makes me wonder where that leaves most of the 18-19 y/o, introverted, under 6’0″, average looking non-firefighters…
Double E says:
@Squared
It leaves the rest of the guys In the Same boat. I lost my V Card at 22 because I was too scared to ask girls on dates. Im only 5’8 but above average in looks and in High School I was an All-State/All-Star Athlete and made Who’s Who all 4 years for both athletics and academics. I was also the first person to ever letter varsity as a freshman in my sport at #$%$ HS. The whole school knew me by name yet I was so introverted I went all 4 years calling people “man” and “dude” in the hallways. Needless to say my first GF came when I was a senior and I finally asked her out after months of flirting with me.
Its a long way from High School now but I do very well with women. I actually talk to people and remember names lol For many guys the battle isnt in understanding women, its within our own heads with something as simple as being naturally introverted and severe approach anxiety. I still have the anxiety, but luckily I overcome it enough these days to actually have a sex life.